Why I am a postpartum doula

When preparing to welcome my first child I thought I had covered all the bases. Car seat, bassinet, swaddles, onesies. I had everything I needed to take care of the new baby, and nothing to take care of myself. It hadn't occurred to me that I was birthing a new version of myself alongside birthing my child. And so I found myself woefully unprepared as I experienced setback after setback once my baby was born.  I believed in the story of individualism and self reliance that we are force fed in this society. I had no community of other mothers who I could reach out to, I had no one I could call to watch the baby for five minutes while I cried in the shower. And so I pushed on, mostly alone, through months that turned into years of postpartum depression. Thankfully no one was hurt. By the time I was preparing to welcome my second baby I had learned a lot more about what a birthing parent needs. So I began to reach out, trying to get a team in place that could help me have a different postpartum experience. And then 2020 hit. My second baby was born in May of that year and needless to say, I experienced that postpartum window mostly alone as well. Because of the research I had done and the growth I had gone through, I knew it wasn't ideal and I knew I shouldn't have to be raising my babies on my own. However, just having the knowledge that the postpartum window could be different had to be enough for me. I did not experience the same deep postpartum depression and was able to see what a supported postpartum window could look like. 
After my first postpartum experience, I decided that I wanted to help other birthers. I began by becoming a yoga teacher and taught pre and postnatal yoga classes. During that time I learned that postpartum doulas existed and I decided then that someday I would become one. And so after my second child when I knew I was done with my own birthing journey I began the journey of helping other postpartum birthers. I am currently completing a training through the Sacred Window Center which is based in Ayurveda. This training has taught me many things, one thing being it's time to show up! And so this is me, showing up, opening my heart and hoping to help whoever finds this and needs it.